Mystery Diagnosis

Ever watch that show? I do. You can catch it on the Discovery Health Channel almost every day. I find the stories fascinating, but what really gets me is the human element behind every diagnosis. I often cry tears of joy for the patients who finally find out what has been ailing them. All the doctors, all the tests, everything just culminates into this gigantic sigh of relief once they are diagnosed, but that diagnosis comes after months, often times years, of suffering and frustration.

Now I feel like I'm on Mystery Diagnosis, and the patient is Isabel.

She had her recheck exam today and what I thought would be a quick exam involving some film snaps of her chest resulting in a thumbs-up from the vet turned into yet another curve ball for us. Instead of ordering some x-rays, Dr. J wanted to re-do the ultrasound of her belly so that he could determine exactly what the mass was attached to. He also wanted to see if the mass might be a lymph node since he had a similar case present itself yesterday, and the mass in the patient's belly turned out to be a lymph node that could not be removed. I left her in very capable hands, came home, and waited.

I didn't expect to hear what the vet was going to tell me.

He found another mass, near her bladder. This news is not good news.

You can see her bladder in the upper right corner of this picture. To the left of it, you see another mass labeled "?" That's the new mystery mass. Below the mass is the aorta running from left to right. Her original mass is rather large extending from her aorta to her abdomen. The vet is concerned that one or both of these masses could be a lymph node. In order to decide whether the masses need to be treated medically or surgically, Isabel has to have an ultrasound biopsy of both. She's scheduled to go in tomorrow at 7:45 am. I'm a mess.

I cried all the way home. I feel as though I'm being tested on so many levels, and I just don't know why. I'm emotionally fatigued which is making me physically exhausted. I wasn't able to run tonight because Dr. J wasn't able to get to Isabel until the evening time which is when I do my runs. I fancy myself a rather strong person, but there's really only so much I can take before I break. And who knows? I may be making a mountain out of a mole hill, but that's the way I am. I've lost too many of my critters to know that these things don't always turn out the way we want them to.

I tried to imagine life without this face:

I couldn't, and I cried some more. Some people reading this entry may say, "But she's just a cat. Get over it." To that statement, I quote one of my all time favorite statements by Mahatma Gandhi:

"The greatness of a nation and it's moral progress can be judged by the way its animals are treated."

I choose to treat my animals with the same love and kindness they show me on a daily basis. They ask for nothing more in return than the basic necessities of life, and they give me so much more every day. They are my kids, and as such, I will do all I can to make sure they live happy, healthy lives. It's the right thing to do, and it's who I am as a person.

So life continues to throw me curve balls. I will try to continue to knock them out of the park, but for now, I think I'll tuck myself in and hope for the best tomorrow.